Coping: Losing a Best Friend

What is a best friend? Why do we have them? Who really needs one? In my opinion a best friend is someone you reveal your darkest secrets to, laugh with uncontrollably, tease during embarrassing moments, and love unconditionally. A best friend is indeed a soul mate, and a person you trust the most.

Losing a Best Friend is Hard

We enjoy moments with our family but there is something special about time with your best friend.

You appreciate the memories of taxi vomiting, criminal dating, teenage Santa Claus beliefs and the fact that you always have that space to talk about it with joy. You adore your conversations with a friend you truly love.

Having a best friend whose amazing and loving is hard to come by. When it does; it’s fulfilling and fun! However, what happens when two people who know each other inside and out fight?

Well the fact of the matter is friends fight. You can’t have different personalities without difference of opinion. Most of the time real best friends talk it out and make it right between each other. The talk is usually influenced by the meaning this person holds in your life along with the relevance of the actual argument.

When the people involved realize that the very thing they are arguing about isn’t worth it they are more likely to put the friendship first. There’s nothing more saddening between friends who fight when they don’t talk. Passive aggressive anger while posting subliminally on social networks is not the way to handle a friendship in trouble.

If the friendship is real then there’s no way we could go on without working it out with our friend.

So my question is, what happens when a fight is so severe that it ends a friendship? What do you tell people? How do you cope with not having that person there anymore? Recently, I lost one of my best friends. It has been a long time coming but it finally ended and badly.

Although my best friend and I said some really mean things to each other, my heart ached after my anger disappeared. I came to the realization, I wouldn’t hear his voice on the other end of my phone, there be no more laughing between us, and most importantly no more drinking wine after work.

How does someone cope with not having that person around? What happens when you see important people in your best friends life delete you from social networking post break up? How do you handle knowing your name is being dragged through the mud?

Although I am completely devastated I know there will be something positive in the end. When important people leave our life it could be forever or a time period. Whether it be forever or a year, sometimes we need to understand what life is without someone in order to appreciate them.

Fighting with friends is a part of life. Although there are solid reasons to end a friendship, most of the time those aren’t factors in many peoples arguments.

It’s human nature to overdramatize situations and become angry with people closest to us. Sometimes we have to sit back and remember that the good usually outweighs the bad. No one is perfect and always in control of their emotions.

Unfortunately, when we let our feelings get the best of us, we could end up pushing our friends away and creating a fight that didn’t need to happen.

If more people humbled themselves and understand that things can get out of hand quickly then we could prevent many fights with the loved ones in our life. If your best friend is a true and loving best friend they will talk with you in order to map out a solution to the problem. Talking honestly with your bestie could solve the problem and both of you could move on.

In some cases, we lose our friend forever. Coping with losing your best friend is a long road that will eventually lead you to understanding and forgiveness. You will feel that void for a while especially during familiar moments or places. The key word is forgiveness, because that word has the power to repair or move on.

Jamilla Ali