Jersey: Lost in Dubai

I long for home everyday. You don’t realize how comfortable and safe you feel until you leave. Well now that life has thrown me some lemons I’ve made lemonade. Dubai has been such an experience since I have arrived. I never thought in a million years that this Jersey girl would ever be this far away from home.

As much as I look out my window and wish I could see my people I think about the blessing. Some people live their whole lives not ever having the experience of being out of the country let alone living there. I am currently looking for ESL work. I am going to be a tutor. People say around here that there is a lot of money to be made by tutoring the locals. So I am going to give it my best. The bright side is it will be more experience to add-on my resume and of course extra MONNNAAYYYYYY (honey boo boo).

If you could remember back to my early videos I was saying that there is no liquor or pork here, well I found both. Oddly enough the liquor store is across the road from the rulers court. I know he is getting a cut off them bottles. So this is how we found the liquor store. We heard from an informant that the liquor store was in Ajman. You know we had to foursquare the place.

I swear people check in everywhere. This place is located behind a damn wall LMAO! When you go beyond the wall you see all the people with the thirst! They sell it out a window or you could go into the store. They’re making CRAZY money in this establishment. The boos are half price. We got the medium size bottle of Absolute and Jose for 16.00 dollars each. That was a straight steal.

I found the pork products in a store called Spinney’s. They have two locations near me. One in Ajman and the other in Dubai. The first time I went into Spinney’s it was an experience. They have a sign up that says for “Non-Muslims” and the contraband is yet again behind a wall. Once you get behind the wall It is like finding the “precious”. BACON BACON BACON EVERYWHERE!!!!!!! (sings)

So I go in and I immediately start to dance in the store. I was doing the bacon dance. At this point I had been away from home for almost two months without pork and to find it was like heaven. Now I love chicken and beef out of all the meat products but it is something about it not being accessible to you that drives you up a damn wall. Ok back to the shopping experience. Me and Jay grab the chops as if the butcher was going to change his mind. We rushed to the cash register and brought the merchandise. We scurried out of the store making sure the bags didn’t show its contents.

You would have thought it was a damn drug deal. We was moving pork back to Sharjah. I am the worst because I am coming out of the store like “We got the Pork!” I’m singing it like George Clinton. Jay immediately stops me in mid song and says you know jail is different out here. Then I replied I got receipts fool! He got a good laugh from that. It almost felt normal finding American products in a foreign country.

Next thing on my list to find is Weave. When I find that I will hit the trifecta! Anyway I just wanted to update my “bareians”  on my UAE experience so far. I swear you all are the best thing that happened to me finally somebody to talk to.

Officially Bared!