Plus Size Positivity: You are Not Your Weight!

I couldn’t sleep last night because this was on my mind about being plus size in the society we live in. I had a very interesting conversation with my best friend who follows a particular blog where this woman was once plus sized appeared to love herself but then decided to have the weight loss surgery. 

In her blogs prior she was very body positive about being plus size and how she never wanted to be thin because she was happy with who she was. She also explained how her size never interfered in how she attracted men and that she was basically happy. Then she had this surgery and all that changed. Now almost a 100 pounds lighter she says how she so much happier, she believes that men were only attracted to her when she was bigger because they thought she was easy, and basically attacking her old self. 

That was heartbreaking for me to hear that she thought men are only attracted to plus size women because they think your easy. To be clear all men think every woman’s easy. Men do a series of tests to see where your head’s at to determine whether they think your easy. You are in control ultimately of how people perceive you regardless of size. I am plus size and I have never nor will I ever be easy. I have always had a level of confidence about me despite my size.

Now making this blog more personal to me. I have been a yo yo dieter my whole life. I have lost gained over and over again. Looking back now on why I wasn’t able to maintain it was because I was thinking too small about the actual weight lost. The most weight I have ever lost without any surgical help was 45 pounds. I was a slave to the gym. I worked out 6 days a week and burned over a 1,000 calories a day. I was very strict on my regimen of eating and I was very diligent in my goals. 

The only problem was I was losing the weight and not happy about it. I lost all this weight but my focus was that it wasn’t enough and that I failed. This then made me very discourage so I still worked out but not as hard. My problem was I was to busy focusing on the goal than the ones I had already met. 

Losing weight is no easy task but I really feel that the only way you are successful at this point is one day at a time. Understand that you are human and that you will fuck up and want cookies. To not beat yourself up because the next day is always another opportunity to start over. Look at yourself in the mirror and know even though your not at your desired weight if you are seeking weight loss that you are the baddest woman in the universe. 

Be comfortable in the skin that you are in and understand that the treadmill is not making you a ten because you already are. Know that when you wake up in the morning and you take that first look when your hair is a mess and your wiping the cold from your eyes that your beauty is from within. It shines through your smile, actions, and your positivity. As corny as this sounds I look at myself completely naked in the mirror and say “You are who you are because this is how God made you to be…Perfect” then I start my day.

The first compliment I receive daily is from myself. I don’t depend on others to love me because I do. Now in no way am I saying losing weight is bad but all I am saying is do it for the right reason. Don’t do it because you don’t like yourself and you feel that number on the scale will heal that self-hatred you have. Do it because you think it will improve your health if you have issues. Losing weight for Vanity never ends well because you are never satisfied. 

Now I have added a daily workout into my routine. I am looking for fast results no. I am thinking I will look a celebrity no. I just like to be active and if I lose some weight in the process cool. I just want all my chubby girls to love themselves and know those “rolls” on your stomach is not all of who you are nor do they make you ugly. Love all your wobbly bits. Embrace and love the skin you’re in because if you don’t no one else will. 

Thanks for listening

Jersey