The Single Woman Files: The 90 Day Rule

Beep! Beep! Beep! The alarm sounded and Carrie was rudely awakened from her slumber. With her eyes closed she searched for the cellphone she hated at the moment to check the time. The time read 3am.

Carrie rolled over and tried to find sleep again. As she suspected it would be difficult. She knew she might as well wake up and try again later. She got out of bed, brushed her teeth, and went to make a bowl of cereal. As she grabbed her favorite corn flakes and shook the box she realized it was empty.

Already wide awake she threw on some sweats, fitted tee, and sneakers then proceeded to the door. Carrie got into the car and drove to the nearest 24 hour store. She could never remember where things were in the store so she ended up scrolling the aisles.

Finally getting to the cereal aisle her ears tune to the store radio station. She heard one of her favorite 80’s jams. In that moment Carrie starts to do a little dance and sing “ha ha ha ha I know this much is true.” She swayed and in perfect harmony as a male voice joined in hitting the last note. “I know I know I know this much is true.” he sang.

Carrie turns towards the voice only to find an older, tall, light-skinned, hazel eyed, solid built man with a warm smile. Carrie was not the timid type and loved to talk to people. She said “hi-five!” The man returned it in celebration.

“Hi my name is Carrie, what’s yours?” she said. “My name is Darren.” he replied. After introductions were made Carrie strikes up a conversation asking why he was in the store so late.

Darren used flirty humor with his answer “This box of cereal and you.” Carrie was very attracted to him and his goofy behavior.

She grabbed her cereal and said “well maybe we can have breakfast sometime.” Darren smiled in agreement. They exchange numbers and waved goodbye. Carrie paid for her cereal and walked back to the car. As she was about to drive away she was feeling good about what had happened.

She was excited about the new man she met and couldn’t wait to call him. She fought the urge the drive home. Carrie knew she had to play it cool if she wanted to see him again. Arriving home she finally makes her breakfast. Carrie ate it on the couch while watching infomercials. Her roommate Jen walks out of her bedroom not fully awake. The sounds of television had disturbed her.

“Carrie why are you awake?” said Jen. “My alarm went off at the wrong time and I couldn’t go back to sleep.” she replied. “I also went to the store and I met a guy.” Carrie said. Jen instantly woke up to hear about her pick-up on aisle seven.

She started to ask a million questions. How did he look? What happened? Do you have his number? When are you going to see him again? Do you think he is the one?

Bombarded by her series of questions Carrie told Jen that he was charming, goofy, and fun. She also explained that she couldn’t wait to see him again. As they continued their girl talk Carrie cellphone rang and it was Darren.

Jen urged Carrie to pick up the phone and she didn’t. Jen was confused by her actions. “I thought you liked him.” she said. “I do.” Carrie replied. “That is why I have to wait it out. I don’t want to look desperate.” she said. “Right.” Jen agreed. After Darren’s missed call there was a text right behind that read:

I know it’s late but it was so good meeting you at the store. You are so fun and I can’t wait to hang out with you again. What are you doing next week? Call me. 

Carrie’s face lit up with joy as she texted back:

Sorry I missed your call. I got caught up with my roommate. How about we meet for drinks Thursday at 4pm at Friday’s? 

Darren replied:

That’s perfect. Friday’s at 4pm I will be there. Again it was nice meeting you. 

Carrie texted back:

Same here Darren. See you then.

Carrie was smiling from ear to ear as the weekend passed on and the work week began. She could hardly concentrate with all the mid-day texting and nightly phone calls from Darren. The conversations were just so effortless and romantic. Carrie had the tingle of nervousness and excitement waking up that Thursday morning in her belly.

She picked out a stylish business casual outfit and then headed to work. She arrived to the office and began to checking her emails. Through out the day she did some paperwork and completed due projects. Carrie then wrapped up and left the office for Friday’s.

Arriving early she sat at the bar to have a glass of white wine. Shortly after the bartender served her, Darren arrived. As he walked toward her he said “Hey!” Darren embraced her with a hug and kiss on the cheek. Carrie smiled and said “Nice to see you.” “You look great Carrie.” said Darren. “Thank you, not to bad yourself.” she replied. “Old Fashion please.” Darren said to the bartender.

As his drink was served the two chatted about work, favorite movies, and future goals. The time seemed to fly while they were talking the afternoon away. As the light turned to dusk Darren asked “What are you doing next weekend?” Carrie replied ” I am not sure I need to check my schedule.” “If you are free Saturday night let’s catch a movie.” Darren offered.

Carrie smiled and said I will let you know. As she took the last sip of her wine she was ready to leave. Darren understood and paid for their tab. While walking out of the eatery he held the door for Carrie to go through first and offered to walk her to her car. Carrie then accepted.

Before she got into the car Darren hugged her. Carrie then released from him with a smile and got into her car. Darren helped shut the driver’s side door as she started the car. Carrie drove away while waving goodbye.

She returned home only to find Jen planted on the couch. Jen turned off the television and said “Okay tell me everything?” Carrie placed down her bag and gave her all the details of the date. She told Jen that he asked her on another date. Jen said “Well?!” “Of course I want to go but I can’t just look like I have nothing to do. I will answer him in tomorrow.” said Carrie. “Well if you really like him you know you need the 90 day rule in place.” said Jen.

Jen explained how the 90 day rule would help her to see the relationship in its true form without being physical. Carrie had never taking on such a challenge because she had sex when she felt like it. Carrie trusted Jen and figured it was worth a try. “This is going to be a long 90 days. That man is fine!” said Carrie as they both laughed.

After speaking to Jen she realized she was ready for a serious relationship. If 90 days of no sex will get her there it will be all worth it in the end. Carrie had a long day and now it was time to shower and gets some rest.

The next morning Carrie receives a text from Darren:

Hello Sunshine 🙂 Our date at Friday’s was amazing. Who knew we had so much in common. Anyway what about the movies on Saturday?

Carrie:

I had a great time Darren. You are a lot of fun. Long as I get to pick the movie we can go. Deal?

Darren:

Oh man I see a romantic comedy coming lol. Either way long as I get to see you again. 

Carrie:

Actually I wanted to see a thriller! lol I will meet you at 8pm the movie of my choice starts at 8:30pm. 

Darren:

Thriller huh? I see you. Okay I will be there. See you Saturday. 

Carrie:

See you then Darren. 

Over the next few months Carrie and Darren were inseparable.  They went to the movies, bowling alley, walks in the park, and multiple dinners. Carrie had never felt this feeling before with anyone. During dinner Darren asked “Carrie would you like to come with me to my company dinner?” She replied ” I would love to go.” “It’s formal so you may need to buy a new dress.” he said.

Carrie was beyond excited and couldn’t wait to be shown off to the people who mattered in his life. While leaving dinner and walking towards the car Darren stopped Carrie and held her. While caught in the moment he went for the kiss. Carrie shared the perfect kiss with this beautiful man on the sidewalk. His arms still wrapped around her waist he continue to caress her lips with his. Darren stopped and said “You want to stay at my place tonight?” Carrie kissed him back while nodding her head in approval.

Darren and Carrie got in the car in route to his place. As Darren drove the two held hands and stole kisses at the red lights. Carrie was excited and nervous because she had never been to his house. She knew what was about to happen tonight and she was ready. Darren pulled into the garage and then hit the switch to pull it down.

After he parked he got out the car and open Carrie’s door. He walked through the loft garage to the elevator. Darren lived on the 5th floor. The elevator stopped and Darren said “follow me.” They arrived at apartment 506. When he opened the door all you could see was a open concept with beautiful modern furniture. The living room was full of black art, musical instruments, and fine details. As Carrie admired her surroundings Darren asked “Something to drink?” She answered “Sure I will have some water. Thank you.” As he fixed her a glass she asked about the paintings. Darren explained that was a hobby he had and that he only hangs the good ones.

Carrie was impressed at his love for art and music. He was such a culture man. Darren gave her the glass of water and she took a sip. He offered her a seat on the leather couch. She sat down and place the glass on the table. Darren turn to her and said “You’re so beautiful.” Carrie smiles while saying “Thank you.” Darren reaches for her face and brings it close to his and begins to kiss her again.

As he kissed her she started to lean back into the couch. His hands scrolled her body with every gentle kiss. Carrie stopped Darren to say “Let’s take this to the bedroom.” Darren followed her instruction by picking her up and taking her into the room. He placed her on the bed and took off his shirt revealing a tight stomach.

Carrie removed her dress as he leaned over her to kiss her neck. She ran her hands down the middle of his back then removed his pants. Only to find that he wasn’t wearing any underwear. It didn’t matter because she loved what she saw.

Completely naked he pulls down her underwear and pushed her higher on the bed. He then used his tongue to consume her. The motion of his tongue achieved Carrie’s release. As her body gave in to him, Darren put on a condom and inserted himself. He stared at her intensely while stroking her. He whispered in ear “Be mine.” Carrie replied “yes.”

Darren kissed her lips once more as they continued to enjoy each other through the night.  The morning came and Carrie woke up alone. She called for Darren and he appeared with breakfast in bed. The tray had delicious fresh fruit, an omelet, and a tall champagne glass full of orange juice.

Carrie was surprised and happy. Darren said “enjoy.” Carrie ate her breakfast and then took a shower. As she wiped the steamed mirror she smiled at herself thinking about the wonderful night she had. While day dreaming Darren comes behind her with a kiss on the neck. “What are you doing today?” he said. “Resting and hanging out with Jen.” she replied. “Okay well let me get you home and I will come around later.” Darren said.

Carrie got dressed and Darren took her home. Jen was up and couldn’t wait to hear what happened. Carrie explained how they had the perfect night and that he asked her to a corporate dinner. Jen was impressed and asked “Do you think there is a future here?” Carrie laughed and said “Yes, but I don’t want to jinx it.”

The day turned into night and Carrie couldn’t help but to text Darren:

Hey Babe are you still coming over?

Darren:

I got held up with work. I need to take care of this but I will be there soon.

Carrie:

Okay see you then.

Carrie became tired and fell asleep. The hours passed and it was now morning. She woke up and realized she wasted the evening. Carrie then checked her cell to find a missed call from Darren and a voice mail.

She then called her voicemail to check the message. While Carrie pressed her pass code she felt bad for falling asleep knowing that he wanted to see her. The voice mail said:

You have one new message. Message at 10:50 pm.

Hey babe I’m sorry I couldn’t make it this evening work had me tied up. I so wanted to be with you but I know it’s late and your probably sleeping.  Again I apologize. I can’t wait to hear your voice. Talk to you tomorrow. 

Carrie wanted to surprise Darren with breakfast after hearing his sweet voicemail. After getting dressed, she drove the store and purchased some corn flakes. Carrie thought it would be sweet to remind him of how they met that early morning in the store.

She parked on the street, grabbed the bag and then walked towards Darren’s front door. She pressed the bell for apartment 506. As the intercom came on a woman said “Who is it?”

Carrie just stood there in disbelief. The woman repeated the question. Carrie dropped the breakfast bag and continued to stand in silence. The woman continued to speak “Baby someone is at the door but I can’t hear anything.” Darren laughs and while explaining sometimes it doesn’t work. By the time Darren came downstairs the corn flakes box was on the porch and in the distance was Carrie’s car.

MORAL– Waiting to have sex with someone isn’t a sure way to a better or long-term relationship. A man will pursue until the time of capture and just like that he is uninterested. If you won’t have sex with him someone else will. Some relationships you have to just see through and hope that the representative you’ve met from the man or woman is who they are.